Of all the emotions I experience, for me, dealing with disappointment is the most uncomfortable. You see, disappointment for me is complicated, complex and brings with it a host of other emotions like anger, hurt, sadness, and probably many others too incidental to give a name to. This sub-set of emotions is easy to deal with. With time, happiness wears off and the clouds of fear and sadness lift, but disappointment I find, lingers long and hovers over us until it is dealt with.
Unfortunately, dealing with disappointment is so much more difficult for adults than it is for kids. Children will throw tantrums, cry, kick and scream until they’ve let it all out but adults are expected to ‘suck it up’ and ‘get over it.’
I think however, that it’s so important for adults to vent occasionally. It’s ok to feel hurt. It’s ok to feel upset. It’s ok to be bothered and uncomfortable. I think what makes life so beautiful is that we get to experience this wide gamut of emotions. The high highs and the low lows and everything in between. Taking time to deal with these emotions and venting is absolutely fine. In fact it’s necessary.
Disappointment does have drastic ripple effects but it should never cloud your judgment or shake your core values. People make mistakes all the time – some petty, some serious. What matters is how well each of us know our core-values and how we allow our values to direct how we feel. More often than not, I choose to be in line with my own personal values over the generally accepted response to a situation. I’m not saying this happens all the time but it helps to give me a moment to stand back, breathe and to review the situation with clear perspective. Many people don’t understand this. I’ve had to answer countless questions all my life but the fact remains that you can either choose to be driven by circumstances or be motivated by what you truly believe in.
Every time I am disappointed, I feel overwhelmed by my emotions but each time I am reminded that I will feel these things again, maybe sooner than I expect. Disappointment is a part of life, part of being human and it’s bound to happen over and over.Of course, I am human and this concept of accepting the inevitable is not as easy for me as I make it sound here, but keeping all these things in mind has truly helped my perspective and my responses to situations I’ve found myself in.
I am the kind of person who tries hard to live by the rules and gets frustrated when other people don’t. I guess that is where being open-hearted comes in. We accept each other anyway, we accommodate people’s mistakes and lapses of judgment and give ourselves time to move on and make peace with it. But right now, today, I’m just not quite there, and that too is perfectly okay.