I just wonder…

Every day, I wake up earlier than I want to and work longer than I want to, in a profession that I’m sure is my calling. But, sometimes I find I have to do things or find, that I’m part of stuff that were never really on my radar for things I want to accomplish in my life. So, why do I still do it?

This past week, I felt the need to rise above the blurry fog of my day-to-day just for a little while, to get a wider perspective on my life and why I continue to do what I do.

I recalled that I’m here in Dubai to gain the experience of living abroad, living independently and to learn and grow. This is meant to be a learning life-experience for me; it is supposed to be a challenge. And it is. It so is!

I could very well stick to the well-worn grooves of the teachers who have come before, but then I wouldn’t grow. It would be very easy to go to work every day, do my job, teach my kids, collect the paycheck, and get by. I could go home to the India or wherever the fates take me without ever having changed or learned anything in the process.

But the scary thing, you see is this, sometimes I tend to get so wrapped up in the day-to-day because it’s tempting to just duck my head and plow forward, doing all the things that I need to do to make my days run smoothly. But there are moments, sudden flashes of realization that I’m gradually forgetting what it is that I had originally set out to achieve.

So, the questions I’m asking myself today are simple, really simple. What kind of life do I want to live? How does this day, this evening, this hour, this minute, fit into that big picture and into that larger scheme of things? Am I just spinning my wheels, following directions because I didn’t bother to give myself directions, or is it part of the grunt-work that needs to get done to make my dreams a reality?

What do I do if I find that my daily life isn’t in line with my larger purpose or the higher calling that I know is meant for me?

I just wonder…


4 comments on “I just wonder…

  1. Just remember friend ” WE ARE NOT PHYSICAL BEINGS LIVING IN A SPIRITUAL WORLD, BUT SPRITUAL BEINGS, EXPERIENCING A PHYSICAL A PHYSICAL BODY”. Maybe if you read the book, The Power Of now by Eckhart Tolle, some of your questions and seachings will be fulfilled.

  2. Don’t we all have those days when we lie in bed before falling asleep wondering “What did I do today? Was I at my best? Could I have done things differently”
    Let me know when you find the answer to your last question

  3. Truly understand, Bro. God knows your sincerity and He will reward you in due season. No experience goes waste and He will turn around everything for good. I just wonder….if you’ve forgotten Joseph!

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